Hello Beautiful and welcome to my blog.
My name is Jasmine. I am a strong and positive woman who felt unloved and the feelings of inadequacy all my life. I kept getting stuck in romantic relationships searching for my soul mate and my life partner.
In this quest I was married and divorced several times. Hoping for my prince charming and love of my life. I was always so embarrassed to talk about it and felt so ashamed that I was a three times divorcee at 32. I wanted the fairy-tale, the perfect partner, the home, love, passion and the perfect little family –exactly how I painted it in my head or how we have been taught it should be. However, my reality was different as I continued to have expectation hangovers and feeling let down by the partners I chose. Like many of us at this age we start to get anxious when we are expected to have it all together, the career, the job, the husband, the children and constantly striving for this perfect life that is just unattainable.
That’s when I started to ask questions, deeper questions and figure out why I was getting stuck in my relationships and why I felt so lost, confused, hurt and unworthy. I went through a depression stage over my last marriage where I felt I had done everything right and still the relationship did not work out. My heart was broken in a million pieces when it ended, and I just couldn’t be strong anymore.
I had been strong since I was 6, the earliest memory I can remember where I learned that I needed to put a smile, hide my emotions and just deal with it. Since then I had been stuffing all my hurt and sadness in a little box. I put on a mask and hid behind my smile like everything was O.K until I just couldn’t do it anymore. I came to a dead-end road and the only way out was going inwards and opening that little box –dusting it off and going through the emotions and the experiences one by one.
The pain was sometimes unbearable that I cried for days. I let the tears I had never cried before out and let the pain heal –opening my heart and accepting my scars as part of my story. A story that is only mine and makes me who I am as a strong, independent and courageous woman. See, I no longer let the past create my future, but I allowed it to make me stronger and wiser.
So much of what happens to us is self-created. Where we continue to live out the same experiences over and over again not understanding why and feeling like a victim of these situations. I started to understand how my past was creating my experiences in the future and where these emotions came from. The journey inwards has not been easy but it’s been so rewarding to understanding myself, accepting the women in the mirror and loving her inside and out.
If you can relate to my story then I am so glad you are reading my blog as I love helping other women that are dealing or have dealt with pain, hurt and confusion heal and find joy and true beauty within.
Stay Connected for more to come!